infinite versions of self
I’ve recently been reflecting a lot on the concept of how multiple versions of ourselves are possible depending on our environments, thoughts, and small choices.
There have been times when people have said to me things like: “oh well that’s just you,” or perhaps the opposite, “wow I wouldn’t have pictured you being interested in that,” ascribing anticipated behavior or interests to how they’ve perceived me.
The thing is, however, I personally do not feel a major difference between the different versions of myself that have existed. For example, when I see pictures of myself from the past that show me in either worse or much better shape, I don’t recall feeling much differently at the time. Yes, working out and being healthier makes you feel better, but it all sort of blends together. Even if the good or bad consequences of living a certain way for an extended period result in a significant difference, a stark contrast is often unnoticeable because the daily, incremental changes in one direction or another are small, and we see our same selves in the mirror every day.
Writing, speaking to the camera, and making videos are all valuable activities to me because they provide documentation that I can reference in the future and recall where I have been mentally and physically. I'm looking forward and am less concerned about the past, but the first things I consider whenever reflecting on the past are both the thoughts and actions that formed me into that person. Ironically, writing and making videos have become important to me also because these are, in fact, some of the actions that help form the type of person I want to be (articulate, aware, fulfilled creatively, etc.).
This is where things become interesting.
We can do things for the hope of outputs in addition to internal results. By outputs, I don’t necessarily mean external validation either financially or through the words of others — an output can be the finished product before you even release it to the world, whereas internal results would be the person you became in the process of creating the product. As Alex Hormozi would say, you can work on something with the understanding that the work itself is working on you. Simultaneously, you can even be specific with the type of indirect results you’re hoping for — fitness is a good example.
I appreciate the non-physical benefits of working out now more than I have in the past:
-To detox and mentally reset my system, I’ll go for a long jog.
-If I need a spike in clarity or creativity, I’ll go for a long walk.
-To let out some aggression and feel like my hormones are firing the right direction, in a healthy way, I’ll lift weights.
-And lastly, when I wish to increase intensity and feel invigorated for days after the workout, I’ll perform some anaerobic, high intensity interval training for about 20 minutes or longer.
Now, my evolving physical abilities, which can vary depending on the types of exercise I’m doing, don’t have a dramatic effect on my daily life while moving through the world. (Grocery bags feel about the same in my hands regardless). However, the type of person I am, independent of physical capabilities, is dramatically impacted by what I am doing. The difference in adaptation between running long distances and lifting heavy weights won’t significantly change my physical, day-to-day interactions, but I try to think about what I’m doing because of the different effects I’ll experience mentally and emotionally.
The information we consume, our environments, company, thoughts, and actions dictate who we’re becoming, and I find it inspiring to think that there are infinite versions of ourselves we can each be. These versions often come into existence as the byproducts of whatever we're working on. Stay cognizant of the potential byproducts.